Alex Rathbone:Prehistory…TBC

The Pink Fat Punk Wurm was slumped in his seat in a right hump!

It was dinner time and he was starving, but it has just been announced that Salad is all his host has on offer. When he was originally invited over for dinner he had steak in mind, or pie at least. But Salad!

He sat at the table, not making conversation with the other guests and generally just having the hump. No one else seemed to mind.

The host gradually began bringing in plates of food and setting them in front of the dinner guests. The Wurm watched, still feeling grumpy, as one by one the guests were served their dinner: a green salad topped with Tuna fish.

He noticed at a casual glance that as each plate came out there was less Tuna on each plate. Until finally his plate arrived with next to no fish on it.

The comparison between the amount of fish on his plate and that of the person next to him was, in his opinion, laughable.

Everyone began to eat their food and the Wurm just sat their glaring at the host, who was sipping wine and sharing funny stories with the other guests.

Then suddenly the Wurm’s neighbour began choking on a mouthful of Tuna. He frantically coughed and spluttered and clutched his throat, and with every cough his eyes became more bulging and desperate looking. This ordeal finally crescendoed with the choking dinner guest projectile vomiting across the table, more or less laying the entire table (and guests!) to waste.

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Photos by Richard Alderson

Cactus

Alex Rathbone // Prehistory…TBC


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